In virtually every meeting that I’m in these days, there’s texting going back and forth between the people sitting at the table and — from the receiving end — anyone from co-workers, customers and vendors, to significant others, family members and the person they just met at Starbuck’s, who they’ll be seeing on a first date that night. And it’s not just Millennials doing it — there are just as many older workers texting away today.

Five years ago, I might have found this to be distracting and distressful—perhaps I might have even labeled the behavior as rude. I would have felt like the texters were dishonoring the meeting and its attendees. However, in 2019, I’ve come to the conclusion, as have many of my colleagues that this is just the way people get work done. Furthermore, sending those texts to non-work people is the way to keep some semblance of a work/life arrangement going—something we all seem to struggle with these days.

But even here in 2019, there are still some important, common courtesy principles for every type of communication you do, so let’s discuss the new rules for communicating at work—specifically through emailing, texting, and using online video meeting software.

 

Email etiquette

Email is still the #1 communication tool in business today. Check out these stats: experts project that by the end of 2019, there will be approximately 2.9 billion email users worldwide – more than one-third the population of the planet. We know that around 124.5 billion business emails were sent every day in 2018 and another 111.1 billion consumer emails were mailed and received. (All I can say is wow…)

What’s more, think about what happens in your work or personal email inboxes if you don’t check them for three or four days. It’s never pretty, is it? (As I type this, I’m currently on holiday in the Canadian wilderness, and I’m dreading opening my inboxes when I get back!) It’s fairly clear that emails are here to stay, so learning how to write an effective and professional message can only help you in both your personal life and in your career.

Let’s start by talking about when you should not use email in business correspondence. Here’s a short list:

  • Disciplinary situations
  • Denial (as in, “I’m not responsible” or “It wasn’t me” messages)
  • Sympathy (unless the email is a follow-up to a previously expressed message—always deliver condolences in person, if possible)
  • Anger (or any other negative emotion)
  • Any message that’s exceptionally confidential/private in nature

And of course, never discuss anything having to do with societal “hot spots,” such as race, ethnicity, gender, religion, or politics. Here’s a good rule of thumb: anything that wouldn’t be appropriate in a printed memo is also not appropriate for email. If you have to pause and wonder whether there’s even a slight chance that someone will be offended (or that you could get into trouble as the author), go back and rethink your email.

Remember also that if you’re using a company computer, someone is always watching—or at least has the ability to. And if you doubt that statement, just go ask your favorite IT person. They will confirm that there is absolutely, 100 percent, no privacy when you fire that computer up, so always exercise caution when sharing sensitive company information.

Finally, using humor in emails can be tricky. If you’re corresponding with someone you know well, chances are you’ll be fine, but when in doubt, don’t do it.

For more email etiquette, here’s a longer blog that I wrote about the topic.

 

Texting etiquette for business:

  1. Text only when there is an established business relationship between you and the “textee” (Hey, I think I just invented a new word!)
  2. Pay attention to timing, and limit texting to regular work hours
  3. Don’t send dozens of text messages—know when it’s time to make an actual phone call
  4. Keep texts brief and to the point
  5. Never text confidential news or information
  6. Remain professional—avoid using “text spelling” like “C u l8r”
  7. Text clear, specific information
  8. Reply promptly, even if it’s to say that you don’t have an answer right now, but you’ll have it by [date or time]. Then, make sure you get back with them by (or before) the deadline.
  9. Sign off gracefully and professionally

Now, I admit that I’m old school on some things, and if I’ve set up a meeting with someone, I put my phone away and give the other person my full attention. And in this situation, I suggest you be a little old school, too. You’ll definitely stand out (in a good way) as a person who is “fully present” and engaged in the task at hand. (Hint: and meeting leaders/organizers will love you for it!)

 

FaceTime or virtual meeting etiquette

With a growing percentage of virtual workers, or employees who regularly work off-site—predicted to be 75 percent or more of the workforce within the decade—people everywhere will be conducting more meetings online instead of face to face. And using FaceTime, Skype, or GoToMeeting carries its own set of etiquette rules:

  1. Check with your meeting partner(s) first

Of course, this first step isn’t compulsory for a pre-scheduled meeting, because, at least in theory, the other people should be ready when the call begins. However, if you need to set up an impromptu video meeting, send a text or email to the person(s) with whom you intend to connect. Especially if they work from home, you never know what they might look like when they pop up on screen, so give them a chance to at least run a comb through their hair before the video call.

And if you’re the one at home, as soon as you’re prepared, shoot a quick text to the meeting organizer, indicating that you’re “camera ready” and standing by for the call.

  1. Never take your phone, tablet or laptop into the bathroom

You may be thinking “Well duh, Denise…” but yes, unbelievable as it sounds (or maybe not, to some of you who have experienced this), there are people who become so laser-focused on the meeting that they’ll forget what they’re doing and carry their device with them into the bathroom at home. Talk about a textbook definition of “TMI!” (As an alternate theory, I’ve often wondered whether these people think we simply won’t notice the “change of scenery” as they walk down the hall and into the bathroom. Well, we do!)

On the other hand, if you really need to “go,” don’t sit and squirm on camera—there’s no need to torture yourself. Same as in a face-to-face meeting, simply take a quick bathroom break, but be sure to turn your camera (and sound) off if the bathroom is close by.

  1. Focus on the task at hand

We all love to multitask, but be sure to resist the temptation while Skyping or using FaceTime. (And trust me, from personal experience, the temptation will be great.) Your texts, DMs, and emails (not to mention your grocery list, your iTunes download, and your vacation planning for Italy) can wait. Concentrate on the person(s) in the meeting and give them your full attention—it’s the polite thing to do. I was once “busted” by the meeting leader for making lunch (I really was) while on an important audio conference call. Evidently, everyone could hear me banging around in my kitchen—and I thought I was being totally stealthy. We all had a good laugh, but I was pretty embarrassed!

  1. Talk normally

Ever tried Skyping with your grandmother, who just can’t figure out where the camera and speaker are, so she just ends up gazing off-screen and yelling into the cosmos? Be patient if meeting with a colleague who isn’t accustomed to the technology, and be sure to offer them some kindly help and encouragement. They’ll appreciate it.

You, on the other hand, talk normally, as if you were having the conversation, face-to-face, in an office.

 

Finally, let me leave you with a message that’s becoming increasingly crucial, as the hectic pace of our lives increases year by year, seemingly exponentially, and as accident/injury/death toll statistics are confirming: using your phone in any capacity while you’re on the road is not safe, period. Any activity that reduces your focus on driving puts both you and everyone else at risk, so please, don’t FaceTime, text, Facebook, tweet, swipe right or left, read your emails, or any other activity that takes your eyes (and your mind) off the road.

Thanks, readers, for your lovely notes and messages. I really appreciate your feedback and words of encouragement, as well as your questions and suggestions for future articles. I’ll be back in another few weeks, so see you then!

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