Have you ever felt like you can’t trust your gut? Are you likely to question your thoughts and actions, often afraid you’re just not good enough? These could be signs you’re not the most confident version of yourself.
Being confident is not about being the loudest, most extroverted person in the room. It’s not proven by reckless risk-taking. And it’s not exclusive to those who are successful…even the most confident people have their own insecurities.
Let’s try a quick exercise: Sit back, relax, and imagine a self-confident person. Consider how they engage those around them. They will genuinely work to listen, understand, and celebrate others. They won’t feel the need to over-explain or justify themselves and their own point of view. Their security shows in their actions. They commit to a decision, stand up for it, and know that they’ll be okay even if it doesn’t turn out exactly the way they planned. Additionally, confident people have the ability to face their fears and apprehensions. It’s not that they’re not afraid, but that they’re better equipped to reassure themselves, and to stand up to the fear itself. Confident people are willing to push their comfort levels more than others. They take on new opportunities, but also implement boundaries when they need to. They aim the bar high because they believe in themselves.
Now, imagine this person is you.
Self-confidence is all about the degree to which you trust yourself and your abilities. When it comes to your career, the level of confidence you have impacts your feelings of fulfillment, and the ways in which you approach new opportunities and challenges. It’s not uncommon to wrestle with feelings of doubt and fear from time to time, but it’s oh-so important to work toward overcoming these feelings of anxiety and embolden faith in yourself. Developing confidence in yourself is to learn to push forward, to continuously grow as a person, and to find comfort in the uncomfortable. The good news is that there are proven ways to do so!
Here are some tips to unlock your full potential, build your confidence, and empower your own success:
Self-reflect and validate
When you’re striving to develop confidence in the workplace, start by reminding yourself of what you’ve already proven to be good at, and keep a record (not just in your head—an actual written record) of any outstanding achievements you’ve accomplished. Take these ideas one step further and use them to inspire positive self-talk, in which you validate yourself intrinsically and affirm your strengths. This will help you to feel more stable and secure in your own skin. Over time you can consistently self-reflect and reassure yourself. Like so many other things I discuss in my articles, positive self-talk is a learned behavior. This method is much more reliable compared to seeking out the validation of others, since what others think or say about you is out of your control and perpetuates uncertainty. Confidence must come from within.
Counteract your weaknesses
No one is perfect, including you, so you may as well embrace your human fallibility wholeheartedly. Recognizing your shortcomings and working to get ahead of them is a way to further develop your confidence. By contrast, feeling like you must hide or cover your weaknesses is only going to place unnecessary pressure on yourself, as well as create anxiety around making mistakes or “being exposed.” So assess your imperfections (you may want to request the input of an honest friend or colleague here), and then develop an actionable plan to work through and improve upon them. Having an actual strategic plan laid out will really help to hold yourself accountable in making progress. You’ll grow as a person, and along the way, you’ll gain more confidence as you cross each accomplished goal off your list.
Keep learning
Building up your knowledge base is another way to gain trust in yourself and your abilities. When you’re well-informed, you can make better decisions, contribute more to discussions, and create more value for your team. Areas to explore include industry familiarity, organizational history, personal skills development (including advanced training in your profession), and learning the particulars about specific project- or client-related services your company performs. With this in hand, you can create a much stronger trajectory for your growth. As entrepreneurial leader Robert F. Smith directs, “Use your skills, your knowledge, your instincts to serve — to go change the world in the way that only you can. Grab hold of your noble intentions and let them expand into the universe of action.” Pursuing success through your unique strengths is a way to be proactive and encourage yourself to venture out of your comfort zone. Implementing what you’ve learned in your day-to-day life will help you prove that you’re capable of accomplishing the unexpected and will help you further develop the skills you need to continue to grow.
Cultivate your relationships
Creating authentic connections with colleagues, peers, employees, and supervisors can really give a boost to your overall morale. The more connected you feel with others, the more likely you are to feel significant and purposeful. Strong relationships help solidify your place at work, and also help to ease discomfort in difficult or stressful situations. They allow you a place to turn when you need help, advice, or have questions. These relationships also present you with the opportunity to teach others and offer advice, which, in turn, allows you to explore new ideas and strengthen your own learning. And when you receive (or give) performance feedback, you can participate in a more constructive dialogue that recognizes intentions and is grounded in your relationship with the person you’re talking to. The support you receive from your colleagues and the support you give back to those all around you makes for a more positive environment that fosters development for all.
Be patient
Gaining confidence takes time and practice. When you are working through self-doubt, it can often be difficult to shift your mindset from negative uncertainty toward a more hopeful outlook. In any scenario, within yourself or when assisting others, find ways to implement optimism, and remind yourself to stand strong. Author and business executive Seth Godin states, “It turns out that choices lead to habits. Habits become talents. Talents are labeled gifts. You’re not born this way; you get this way.” It takes practice to break a conditioned response, meaning this may feel ingenuine or awkward at first. The important thing is to keep going. Over time, the more you can create a habit of standing up straight and assuring yourself of your capabilities, the more you’ll demonstrate your worth to others, and most importantly, to yourself!
What other ways have you been able to develop confidence in the workplace? I’d love to hear from you! As always, feel free to contact me on my website with your comments, suggestions, and questions. See you in three weeks!