Hello, and welcome to Part II of my series on five ways to amp up your virtual communication skills. In Part I, we discussed finding a role model and learning from them, and lowering our voice pitch. (If you need a quick review, here’s a link back to Part I: Five tips for amping up your communication skills in virtual meetings, job interviews, and business presentations – Part I | Denise M Dudley
Today, we’re going to jump right in with three more tips you can immediately use to come across more knowledgably and powerfully. Here we go:
3. Clean up your verbal static. Do your best to eliminate what are called “fillers,” or “verbal crutches.” They’re the sounds or words you use when you’re considering what to say, such as “umm,” “uhh,” “ya know,” and “okaaay.” It’s perfectly fine to stop and think every now and then (in fact, it’s a good idea, so as not to say something you don’t mean or might regret), but while you’re pondering, it’s important to resist the urge to “fill the air.” You’ll sound far more powerful if you simply allow yourself to be silent for a quick moment, think of what you want to say, and then continue speaking.
So how do you work to eliminate your fillers? Two ways. The first one is to record yourself during a normal conversation and then play it back. Be prepared—you may use more fillers than you think! Once you become aware of your own personal “favorites,” it’s much easier to make a change, because you’ll be better able to hear yourself when you use them.
The second way is enlisting the assistance of a trusted friend or colleague. Ask them to listen to you, and to silently—without interrupting your speech—point out when you’re using a filler. So how do they silently tell you? By raising their eyebrows, wiggling their noses, sticking out their tongues, or any other motion that gets your attention without actually stopping you. Again, using this method, you’ll start to become aware of your fillers, and you’ll be better able to eliminate them.
4. Speak in paragraphs. In other words, break your entire message into smaller segments, and then deliver the “bite-sized” portions, one at a time, pausing between the “thought elements,” allowing others to absorb what you’re saying (and to possibly respond—more on that in tip #5), and then continuing. It’s very exhausting for your listeners to hear one run-on thought after another, delivered without a break, and in random order. Plus, it makes you sound muddled and unprepared. Do your listeners a favor and organize your thoughts before you speak—you’ll sound far more powerful and in control, and they’ll appreciate you for your efforts.
Obviously, when you’re zooming with your grandmother about the new bike you bought (and how hard it was to assemble!), breaking your message into paragraphs isn’t really that essential (although I bet even your granny would appreciate it if you didn’t go on and on without a real point to your story!). It’s when you have an important, complicated, or difficult message to share that you want to pay careful attention to your form. It’s actually the speaker’s job—and not the listener’s—to make sure your message is clearly understood, so do what you would do if you were writing a report: organize your thoughts, put them in logical order, and then deliver them accordingly.
5. Hit your “pause button” a little more often than usual. In a virtual setting, this tip is particularly important for two reasons. First, it’s virtually (no pun intended) impossible for you, as the speaker, to watch everyone on your screen and look for signs of confusion or boredom, so rambling on for too long may result in losing your audience altogether. Second, in a virtual meeting, it’s extra difficult for your listeners to stop you and ask for clarification—especially if you or the meeting host are employing the mute option. (Perhaps you yourself have had this happen at the “receiving” end: you want or need to add information to the discussion, but your screen image is the size of a postage stamp and no one is noticing your tiny little hand motions.) Instead, by occasionally pausing and asking whether everyone is “with you,” you’ll eliminate—or at least greatly reduce—this occurrence, along with everyone’s frustrations.
There you go. Simple steps, right? But don’t underestimate their value. Just practice these five virtual communication tips and you’ll instantly improve your ability come across like you know what you’re talking about!
And by the way, these same skills will also help when you’re back in face-tp-face meetings and conversations…someday, someday…
Keep the faith that “someday” will be here soon, and in the meantime, stay safe, stay positive, and stay in touch! You can always reach me (and suggest future topics) on my website.